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What absolute exquisite Joy to be totally and completely unconditionally loved!! And all for the smaltry price of a can of Chicken Chunks in Gravy mixed with crunchy bites of Cat Chow!
In exchange for this small pittance, I am blessed with the attention of not one, not two, but THREE fur-wrapped Angels of Light.
As I settle in for an evening of channel surfing and munchies, my scented candles filling the room with a murky glow, I am soon joined by my frisky feline friends.Merlin, the only male, asserts his dominance and quickly chooses the choicest of spots. After a few head butts and a couple of cheek rubs to let me know that petting can commence at any time, he promptly curls up on my chest and begins his rhythmic Thrrrrrrr, Thrrrrrrr, Thrrrrrrr. The warmth and weight of his body, the color of spiced pumpkin pie sprinkled with whipped cream, sends ripples of pleasure and Love throughout my being. I gently begin to stroke him.
Always the curious one, Athena, the baby and runt of the family, scrambles and claws her way up the side of the couch to see what's going on. A blink, then two, she quickly sums up the situation and decides she wants to be a part of it. Padding her way up my body, she gives her brother a lick and a nudge and then turns and flops on my just-a-little-too-soft-for-modeling belly.
A smile curls around my lips. Could Life GET any better than this??
Suddenly Shadow, her Grace and Highness, who is not too fond of public displays of affection, silently sidles up beside me and settles her beautiful crushed black velvet self on the top of the couch, right beside my head. I am a little startled and surprised at this un-expected turn of events and I send her a quiet fond-filled "hello", ever mindful of the terror she lived as an abandoned kitten in a back alley dumpster.
I relax my body and sink deeper into the couch. Peace and contentment spreading through me like warm peanut-butter. I glance out my bay window and stare dreamily into the Midnight darkness, the thick silence surrounding me like a well-worn, well-loved blanket. The smile on my face broadens as I watch Mother Moon play peek-a-boo with the passing clouds.
I let my eyelids droop to half-mast, just like the cats do. I notice all our breathing is in unison, as I am guessing our Hearts are.
AHHHHHHHH, I don't think any amount of money could ever purchase this moment.
L,L,L,
Dianna :-)
posted by Dianna Kobley 12:53 PM
I know I attract everything into my experience, including this back injury that has left me pretty much immobilized in my bed.Yep! Even peeing in bedpans and diapers. Talk about a bit of an Ego blow!!I have also come to realize that this could possibly be he best thing that ever happened to me.Pretty much EVERYTHING has been stripped away from me that kept me going around and around in that hamster wheel of Life.I now have 24 hours of EVERYDAY of absolute "stillness". No more busy-ness to interfere with getting to know my deepest Inner Self. No more dishes, laundry, what to make for dinner. Just four square walls and me!!
I got bored of the t.v. they brought in for me pretty quickly (the first day). Now it is just a big black box sitting mute in the corner. I have surrounded my Self with all my favorite books. It is an amazing way to read when all you have is "time" on your hands. Each word seems a little deeper, a little richer. Inner Truths I had missed on the first reading because I was distracted by something or other are now blazingly, screachingly clear!
The drugs they have me on for the pain are quite the funky experience. With stretches and stretches of moments to your Self falling in and out of different states of consciousness happens so smoothly, fluidly. I have been going out of body, practicing my telekinesis and "maganetizing", but I am going to have to say the truly mind-blowing, consciousness expanding experience I have had was when they had me on the morphine for about 3 days. The line between realities began to smugde, blur, the went almost completely non-existent.
I would be lying there talking to Bruce, when suddenly Bruce turned into a King and I a peasant.
We were in the 17th century sometime, standing side-by-side, fighting a terrific battle. Our heavy swords glinting in the bright sunlight just before they came down with a heavy CLASH over our enemies helmets. Then just as suddenly I would open my eyes and I would be back in the crisp glaring whiteness of the sterile hospital room, the clashing swords echoing in my ears.
This happened constantly. All different "times", all different realities.
I asked Bruce if I was falling asleep and he said "No, you just sort of close your eyes and "go off somewhere", and just as quickly and silently you open them and are back."
Sometimes the realities would merge and happen "side-by-side" or one over the top of the other.
There was this one time when I asked Bruce if he could brush my hair. This was about the the third day in the hospital and my hair was getting pretty ratty from lying on it all the time. Bruce got into the bed with me the best he could and I lay my head on his lap. Suddenly the "reality shift" happened again, only this time it didn't fully shift. With the other shifts I would "forget" all about the "us-es in the hospital room reality" and COMPLETELY BE IN the King and Peasant reality. The King and Peasant had no idea about US. This time I still retained enough consciousness of "Bruce and I in the hospital room" AND I could feel the King and Peasant Aspects of us. Like the two realities were happening at THE EXACT SAME TIME! With each stroke of the brush that Bruce placed over my hair, at the EXACT SAME TIME I could feel the King match stroke for stroke to the Peasant's hair. I was both "me" AND the PEASANT at the same "time"
It was a totally awesome experience, and the concept ALL TIME IS NOW and that all realities co-exist amongst and alongside each other is now solidified in my mind. Also seeing just a fraction of the immenseness of my total BEING was indescribable!
I have to admit the constraints of not being able to move can be a little frustrating, but what I am gaining in experience is worth more than I can ever say. I am pretty much completely isolated from the "outside world", leaving me free to explore unprejudiced the Inner Worlds!
I even saw some fairies and gnomes peeking out of my closet door in the middle of the night.I couldn't see them clearly, just the merest outline of a shadow, but I could swear they were smiling, and I thought I heard a voice in my head that was not my own that said "Almost . . . . . . . she's almost ready to see."
I will keep writing of my midnight Inner escapades for as long as I can. Maybe I can leave a trail for other's to follow.There is a line or two I particularly like from Richard Bach's Out Of My Mind, The Discovery of Saunders-Vixen . . . . . . . ." It's not as if one needs a passport. Anybody can come, who loves it here. A few decide to stay . . . . ."
L,L,L,
Dianna
posted by Dianna Kobley 5:58 PM
Here is a totally cool experience if I do say so myself! It happened a while ago, but I think I will post it now :-)My girlfriend had lent me her car as she was going out of town for a week. I was thrilled and excited to have it as I have no car of my own at the moment. The day after she lent it to me was my day off, and I awoke with a sense of freedom and adventure knowing I could "go anywhere I wanted". Her car is a hatchback and I folded down the back seats, laid a blanket down, grabbed my yellow lab (and best friend in the world) J.D. and soon we were off! for some fun, sun and adventure.
We spent the day driving all over the place, going for walks in parks we can't usually get to, shopping, and stopping for bites to eat, which of course we shared :-)
At the end of the day, tired from our all day adventure, we started the drive back home (about 30 minutes from Victoria, Canada). I had the stereo blasting, the warm wind rushing by me from the open window, when I peeked in the rear view mirror to see how J.D. was doing. That's when I almost drove off the road, because he WAS NOT THERE!With my heart pounding and my mind racing, I checked to make sure there wasn't much traffic around me, then eased into the slow lane.
I then metally said "J.D., where ever you are, can you please come back! I need you to be with me!"
I waited a moment, took a deep breath, then turned around and looked in the back seat again, and sure enough there he was! I gave him a quick admonishment (more to release the fear I felt at him not being there) and told him not to do that again, especially when I am driving! He gave me an apologetic look, and I heard his telepathic "Sorry" in my mind. I also started to remember all the other times this had happened before. I used to just dismiss it by thinking I just hadn't seen him.
Now a question or two :-)
Did I :
1. In my relaxed state "forget" to include J.D. in my reality, which is why he wasn't there.
Or
2. Did J.D. take advantage of my "relaxed state" to dematerialize his physical body to go "wherever" and then when he heard my mental plea to come back, rematerialize his physical body back to my reality?Email me your answers if you like!
Dianna
posted by Dianna Kobley 11:11 AM
I want to share with you the most incredible experience I just had, before the intensity of the moment slips from my mind to become a distant pleasurable memory.I was enjoying my nightly ritual of a long luxurious soak in a steaming hot tub, filled to the brim with my favorite apple blossom bubble bath. The scented candles I placed all around flickering an incandescent glow throughout the room.
As I lay in the liquid warmth, I could feel my senses begin to dull, my mind begin to quiet. Suddenly I am not alone!
A little orange nose pops up, with whiskers following, and the most incredible amber eyes I have ever seen. Merlin, our precious little buddy, our orange striped clown-about-town decides to join me.
"Hi!" I say "Come to keep me company?"
a blink and a twitch of the tail is what I get for an answer. He decides to investigate. Although he has seen me partake of this ritual numerous times, in all of his 5 month old Cat Wisdom, he still can't figure out what all the fuss is about.
He strolls back and forth along the rim. Dips a toe in. Whoa!! he jumps back, and looks at me as if to say "That's WATER!!"
I smile and let out a sigh of pleasure as I sink deeper into the soft-as-silk water.
Next I hear a KATHUMP! And then a scratch, scratch, scramble, scramble. I open my eyes. Peering at me is sea-green and yellow curiosity surrounded by black stripes and cream. A delicate nose touches mine.
"Hi Athena" I say "My little Angel, my warrior princess." She seems to nod at me and then looks over at her brother who is absolutely fascinated with the small droplets of water leaving the faucet to drip, drip, drip into the tub.
As I watch the two of them together I marvel at the difference in their size. The only two in the litter Athena, born last, just can't seem to catch up to her larger, stockier brother.
Again I settle into the tub and spend a few minutes delighted and amused at the antics of my companions. Life certainly hasn't been the same since we became the adoptive parents of these fur wrapped Lights of Love a few short weeks ago.
Suddenly, black satin sitting beside me, a whisper on the wind. Sleek and sure, poised with regal bearing. Her stature as she sits daintily on the edge of the bath, belies her humble beginnings as a back alley stray. I slowly hold out my hand to her, mindful of the terror she lived as an abandoned kitten. I am still honored that she chose me to be her confidante, her friend.
Laying in the bath I am incredulous at my good fortune. I usually get paid a visit by one or the other of the three, but this is the first time that ALL of them have come a callin'! :-)
Then that's when it happened. That is when the moment I will never forget happened! Shadow was sitting at my left shoulder, Athena was practically under the faucet and Merlin was in between the two. Next, Merlin looked up and his and Shadow's eyes locked. It was only for a moment, a raindrop in the bucket of time, but in that second I SAW them telepathically communicate!!
I can't explain it, I just KNOW that is what they were doing. Oh how desperately I wanted to expand my awareness just a fraction more so I could know what they had said to each other!! I have gotten fairly fluent in the telepathic language of People/Cat, but Cat/Cat was a mystery to me. I SO wanted to part of that exchange!
Next Merlin looked over at me. He KNEW that I knew what they had just did. He glanced back at Shadow, another exchange, and
then jumped down to the bathroom floor. Shadow followed and out the bathroom door the two trotted.Awash in excitement over what had just transpired I jumped out of the tub, blew out my candles and threw on my robe and here I am typing this out for all of you :-)
The kittens are behind me, back to doing what kittens do, running, jumping, playing. And here I am, my mere mortal mind trying to hold onto that moment of time by writing it in a post. :-)
Love, LIght and Laughter,
Dianna
posted by Dianna Kobley 12:36 AM
