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welll i am back. pretty tired actually! i had work from 8 til 3pm at gap then i had to go to my other job at the research firm from 5 till 10pm.
anyways.. i can't believe it's been a month since my father's death. the time is sure going fast. and about 2 weeks, i will be starting university... can't wait!
posted by Intisar Adnan 8/18/2000 11:25:46 PM
went to see coyote ugly last night with a friend and it was a amazing movie. but the commericals that i saw for the movie on tv give a wrong impression of the movie. when i went to see at first, i thought it would be about a much of girls
posted by Intisar Adnan 8/9/2000 9:59:26 PM
my week was somewhat very hactic but good. it's carabana weekend and i am having lots of fun. i was walking downtown yesturday with my friends and noticed there were alot of tourists here. mostly from michigan, ohio and new york and i had fun meeting alot of them.on thursday night, lynn and i went to the Peel Pub for a few drinks. it's been a while since me and her talked and i had to catch her up on alot of things espically about the death of my father and stuff. she also had to catch me up on alot of stuff about her and it was a good thing i had a few drinks first before she told me this big secret cuz i don't think i could have handled it. anyways... it was fun considering lynn and i were drunk going home but we made it back in one piece.
last weekend, my friend charlene and i went clubbing with a few other friends at oasis nite club. it was fun. the bouncer of the club was hitting on me and he was actually cute, but a little to old but his muscles made up for everything.
posted by Intisar Adnan 8/6/2000 6:56:42 PM
it's been a while. where can i start? i have soo much to tell! my life is changing so much and so fast that it's been very crazy for me. alot of the changes are for the better but some are really bad.
well first off... remember those nervous feelings that i was having about a week ago?... welll my father died!... a day after i was having those feelings, my mother and i decided to visit him at his house and we found him almost dead in his bed. it was sooOOoo scary. i have never felt the way i have that night. it was a mixture of shock, saddness, anger, denial and everything else. it was the longest week in my entire life. the funeral, the burial, the mourning, and everthing else that happened that week was very stressful and crazy! it's been almost a week now and i still can't believe it. i think i am in denial right now and i am in shock still. it's weird because it hasn't hit me yet cuz i haven't cried yet.second... i had go to summer school because the university that i am going to this fall requested that i upgrade my oac english by the 18th of august but because of the death of my father i had to drop out cuz i missed too many classes. now they want me to take this test at the University of Toronto instead. i am so nervous.
third... i was offered this managment position at this retail store but i am not sure if i want to take it because of of my job right now. i love where i work right now and the pay is good and i don't want to leave but i know if i take the manager position i will be better off in the long run because i will have the experience. i don't know what to do.
one last thing that is really bothering me.. i have been thinking about ex-boyfriend lately... i know i shoudn't be thinking of him but i miss him alot and it's really hard for me to get over him even though i have been with other guys since our breakup, i can't stop thinking about him.
i am so tired.
posted by Intisar Adnan 7/26/2000 9:51:40 PM
tonight i have been having this really wierd feelings in my stomach. i don't know what it is but i really hope that it goes away. i am so nervous and i feel like something is going to happen... maybe something good or something bad.. who knows?i really don't like having butterflies in my stomach for no reason at all. i have been having this dream lately.. is the same dream all the time....somewhat bad i guess... i don't know... last time i had a bad dream, i told someone and it came true.. don't want that to happen again so i have kept my mouth shut.
it's getting really hot now and i am starting to sweat... not good.
my mom is having this really bad feeling too.. i wonder why.. what can it mean?
posted by Intisar Adnan 7/12/2000 9:34:26 PM
Don't have to stay with someone
That makes you cry
You'll end up killing all the love you have inside
Can't hope to see the sun
If you don't open your eyes
Boy don't let real love pass you by
Every day I want to pick up the phone
And tell you that
You're everything I need and more
If only I could find you
Like a cold Summer afternoon
Like the snow coming down in June
Like a wedding without a groom
I'm missing you
I'm the desert without the sand
I'm the one without a band
I'm a ring without a hand
I'm missing you
posted by Intisar Adnan 7/3/2000 12:51:20 PM
A thousand years, a thousand more,
A thousand times a million doors to eternity
I may have lived a thousand lives, a thousand times
An endless turning stairway climbs
To a tower of souls
If it takes another thousand years, a thousand wars,
The towers rise to numberless floors in space
I could shed another million tears, a million breaths,
A million names but only one truth to face
A million roads, a million fears
A million suns, ten million years of uncertainty
I could speak a million lies, a million songs,
A million rights, a million wrongs in this balance of time
But if there was a single truth, a single light
A single thought, a singular touch of grace
Then following this single point , this single flame,
The single haunted memory of your face
I still love you
I still want you
A thousand times the mysteries unfold themselves
Like galaxies in my head
I may be numberless, I may be innocent
I may know many things, I may be ignorant
Or I could ride with kings and conquer many lands
Or win this world at cards and let it slip my hands
I could be cannon food, destroyed a thousand times
Reborn as fortune's child to judge another's crimes
Or wear this pilgrim's cloak, or be a common thief
I've kept this single faith, I have but one belief
I still love you
I still want you
A thousand times the mysteries unfold themselves
Like galaxies in my head
On and on the mysteries unwind themselves
Eternities still unsaid
posted by Intisar Adnan 6/29/2000 6:56:35 PM
What a weird week it has been. Besides the fact that school is finally over and i won't be seeing alot of my friends because they are going off to different universities then i am... my great-uncle just died a few days.
I started to paint today. I haven't painted in such a long time because I was busy working on my other art works. anyways... this painting that i did was small but powerful. the colors that i used were very dramatic. it had a river the was crushing into the rocks and little trees in the background. There was also this big tree in the middle with it's roots coming out of the earth. to me this painting symbolizes power and rebirth.
posted by Intisar Adnan 6/28/2000 10:12:45 PM
IT'S FINALLY OVER!
the past week and a half has been the one the craziest weeks ever. alot happened in such a short time.
classes were finally over and started to study for my final exams! i had my final exams for english and world issues. went pretty well. school is done. high-school is finally over. can't wait to start my summer. no more high-school life for me.
had to say good-bye to alot of people. won't be seeing them anymore. hopefully in the future we might bump into each other and remember the old times and the memories i shared with alot of them.
feels like i am drifting apart from one of my best-friend that i have known almost all my life. 12 years to be exact. we have been through sooo much and she has been the greatest friend for the past 12 years and more.
throughout my high school life, even though I have lost some great friends, I still managed to have made special friends along the way. even though we all leaving and going our seperate ways, i don't want to lose touch.
high-school life is done and now university life is about to begin. hopefully it will be bigger and better.
feels like a whole new part of my life is beginning. a whole new chapter in my life that will change everything. i feel confident. i feel strong. i feel good about myslef. I don't know, it gives me this sense of empowerment, I guess.
posted by Intisar Adnan 6/27/2000 8:28:40 PM
Well... I am about to go to the Argo's game very soon... I am soo exicted! See ya after the game
posted by Intisar Adnan 6/17/2000 5:20:57 PM
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