spoken by the almighty one (after a beer or three): I miss downloading my porn at high speed. Three cheers for EarthLink: Fast(?), reliable (??) dial-up (!) Internet service...
UpdateMonkey v1.0

well, i figured i'd post this just so all you jealous dial-up monkies could see, 2.18 MB/sec from a microshaft website while d/ling directx. yes, i know, bow down before my insane d/ling speeds and my 1.2 Ghz processor... but, just 1 quick question, how is dial-up running today fella's? :)
the Bitch's Jester

you want the xerox guy to touch your... what?!? This message has been brought to you by... Road Runner High-Speed Online by Time Warner! (up to fifty times faster than coyote-preferred dial-up!)
UpdateMonkey v1.0

xerox guy and i have two classes together, networks and architecture. those classes may sound difficult but on any given day, when xerox guy isn't passed out in lecture, all we do is make fun of the professor and talk about how we already aced this class when it was called organization. the nice thing about not having to pay attention to the professor is that it gives us (well me) more time to talk to the hotties that have no idea what the professor is talking about. "oh yea babee, no problem, I'll explain everything, now lay down."
poppasp1ce

internet explorer 6 is out, officially.
poppasp1ce

you need to rework your html skillz.
poppasp1ce

Your administrator is back! PHE4R!! :D
glycer1ne

so umonkey doesn't look like a complete moron, i believe what he meant to say was: 0.0056 < 1.500 or 56k < 1.5Mb.
poppasp1ce

The Xerox guy agrees with me as well! He said that he really liked the comment and also gave me permission to write anything I want about him on Formatc ;) Hummm...let me see: I think I saw him at Chipendale's one time spanking one of the strippers. He had leopard skin thongs on...grrrrh.....nah I'll be gentle on him this time...;)
Kosovarja

Just a little explanation of the last comment poppa made; We were playing the "asshole" card game and considering the fact that I was under the influence of I don't know what, I was feeling sympathy for the assholes of the game (me being one of them;)
Kosovarja

Reminder: 56 < 1.500
UpdateMonkey v1.0

oh man, whoever was not at whitney's place tonight missed out BIG TIME. don't worry though, we've got it all on tape. alcohol makes people say some fucked up shit, for instance (and I quote): kosovarja -- "assholes are awesome..."
poppasp1ce

Agreed about Earthlink and DSL. On that note, the BroadBandMonkey just downloaded a file at nearly 300 k/s.
UpdateMonkey v1.0

"ONLINE, damn it!"

FUCK!
poppasp1ce

earthlink and dsl are two words that just don't go together
Denny

ONLINE, damn it! (not onlie)...

I'll suck er1c's **** for just one day on broadband -- Sp1ce

Say What? WTF!
UpdateMonkey v1.0

NVIDIA!!!
poppasp1ce

we've got the dial-up blues still. we got our dsl modem(s) on monday(and tuesday) but something is wrong with our line. so this sucks. i fixed my computer after jonothan gave me the "rogue spear virus", now everything seems to be back to normal. happy birthday to n1cole! the big one-six, congratulations(harharhar)!!
poppasp1ce

supposedly, earthlink sent er1c an email saying we should get our dsl package "no later than the 14th." let's hope they meant august. the recent lack of updates is due mostly to the fact that the FORMATCONLINE.COM central hub has become more of a lanparty central than anything else. usually we play some red alert 2, urban terror ß2.2, a little age of empire 2, hopefully some rogue spear, and most recently, some quake3. although when it was time to play quake, i was "democratically removed" from my computer.
poppasp1ce

phase two of my hair dying fiasco is complete. the hair color is now more blond than the earlier orange that i had. i changed my major from computer science to computer information technology. that means that i will hopefully graduate within the next ten years. good thing is that most of my computer science courses are above and beyond what is required for IT, hence most of the cs courses overlap IT. tentative graduation date: spring 2002. i saw american pie 2 and rush hour 2 on their respective opening days. rush hour 2 was awesome pulling in 60 million this weekend, that's about 40 more than the next closest. american pie 2 was, well, okay. not as good as the first one in my opinion, but good nonetheless. got a comment? the answer is its not done.
poppasp1ce

you want er1c's what?
poppasp1ce

I know that Sp1ce owns all, but this really went too far...

BTW: CNET reports that the UpdateMonkey a/k/a Dr. Broadband is currently running at 1292.1 kbps... **SQUISH** **SQUISH** uhh, my eye!

P.S. I want Eric's massive cock.
UpdateMonkey v1.0

you love eric?
poppasp1ce

726.7 kbps... uuuhhhhhhhhhh... **squish** **squish**

P.S. I love Eric.
UpdateMonkey v1.0

It would appear that seniority has made our bitch wiser... err, did I just say that, or is it the beer talking? I rarely drink, therefore, it must have been me who said that, but then again, I momentarily forgot that I'm a sarcastic asshole. Before I stray too far off course, yes, our bitch must have noticed (and removed) the rainbow decal as it is no longer displayed across the back of the mighty Bonneville. Remarkably enough, he has yet to mention it. Could it be? Has the bitch finally figured out that by not throwing a riduculous temper-tantrum (sp?), our enjoyment is radically diminished? In the immortal words of the almighty one (unspoken for far too long), FUCK THAT. I doubt if he figured it out yet, just too lazy to raise a fuss. And, most importantly, I do not forsee our pranks coming to an end any time soon (and I think I speak for the members of the Homeowner's Association and its otherwise affiliated members -- past, present, and future). BTW, if the almighty one is reading this post, you owe BrokerJ $1.50, plus tax. Cash only, please -- your credit is no good here, or any place else...

Oh, and most importantly, the folks at CNET say I'm currently running at **652.3 kbps** **OMFG!** In layman's terms, that's over TWELVE times faster than the maximum attainable speed on DIAL-UP...

Editor's Note: I didn't know Dial-Up was still available in 2001...
UpdateMonkey v1.0