"A pre-bedtime game of 'peeks!' (taken seconds before he tumbled out of the box, cracked his skull and roared for five minutes!)"
Fell on my head, eh? That explains a lot.
the people on the radio are screaming bloody murder. kill the bastards. bomb them to shit. remove them from the gene pool.
and all i see is marching men with uniforms of grey and red. nationalism made the US strong, and nationalism will lead them into a river of blood.
thousands missing and the loss has just begun.
another pearl harbour? maybe. in more way than one.
dubya's got his war. and his toy ships are floating through the bath tub.
and all i want. all i crave. is silence.
a moment to mourn the loss of so many lives. a moment away from the hatred. and the fear.
but i won't ever get that. and that's how my way of life has been changed.
The world is a ridiculous place.
And, as Dante said: I hope Bush doesn't do something stupid. Things could get a whole lot worse.
I think of the strangest things late at night. Here's an excerpt:
"The sense of smell truly baffles me. Of all the senses it has the longest and most intense sense-memory. Patchoulli makes me think of Julia. Chanel No. 5 makes me think of my mother.
I feel the grass beneath my hands, but it doesn't cause memories of happy summers to rush through my body. Yet smelling freshly baked cookies throws me into a sate of reverie unlike anything else. Sound has a mild sense-memory, in that a certain type of noise (funnily enough the fry buzzer at mcDonalds) reminds me of my alarm clock and makes me shudder. But this is more about conditioning.
* * *
It seems as if everythng is happening faster. social revolutions happen every few years. great technological leaps and bounds are taken once a month. Is this true? are we really developing at an exponential rate, or is it all just our perspective. In the past, it seemed as if great changes took decades - sometimes centuries - to come about. But was it really like that? Or have we just forgotten or ignored the day to day advances?
* * *
An author once said that people of the middle ages looked upon the future with fear and cynical resignation, and that we too have this attitude -- or atleast we should. But is this true? what have we (a north americans) got to fear? We worry about overpopulation, yet only 10 percent of canada is populated. Holes in the ozone layer? Forgotten by '96. Is the world really coming to an end, or is it all foolish sensationalism used to scare us into buying Newsweek and Times?"
I apologize for the sloppyness of the writing, but it was 3 am and I was pretty tired.
Welcome back
Tim. I'm liking the new design, makes my creative juices flow (
not those ones).
the girl across the hall is moving. and she's crying. says the landlords been coming in while she sleeps. that he's harassing her. he says she won't pay the rent. and here I am, playing audience to a reality-tv writer's wet dream with wine in a plastic cup and a craving for camels. an empty imprint on the bed. I want to feel better. I want to feel safe. but my lover's gone away. and the night seems too long.
lilting greens drip golden on the canvas stretched across the frame that is my julia. i know i'll see her soon. smiles and hugs and silences that are never uncomfortable.
the evening's are getting colder. fans sit silently and the curtains reach into the darkness propelled by a curious chill. cars, sirens and other sounds from the street below sing me a lullaby that I feel I should remember. the darkness behind my eyes is humming as I feel myself drift off to sleep.
