9.18.2001

Gemini:

     "Let's get this over with right away. Geminis are dreadful. Faithless, lying strands of pond scum who ruin people's lives and then go on to gleefully develop the episode into a funny anecdote or - worse - a sitcom.

Libra:

     "The whim of steel is one of the Libran indicators. Nor are these people particularly subtle about it. If you won't indulge their sudden whim to (say) buy $200 worth of Indian food ingredients and an antique lentil bean crusher so they can make dahl the traditional way, than they'll find someone who will. Easy. Especially for the Libran woman.
10:39 AM :: Jairus :: link :: 1 comment

9.17.2001

let's take a little trip to the past... this is an excerpt from jösh's journal on his birthday last year....

Yay! Another birthday gone by and I am happy...see =). Lots of good stuff for me I am viewing the NIN video my brother and Jes (who stabbed me with her birthday fairy wand last night) got fer me, it's purrty.

Today was just a "normal" day schoolins then the long bus ride home *sigh*. I have come to realize that the build up to yer birthday is great, but it's over to damn quick. A very happy un-birthday to me, yes me heh. Yet again off to Will's house tonight for mass amounts of nutella *drool*.

I will have lots of munny soon and when I get my heaps of cash dolla bills yo I am gettin some whack assed shades...yo hehe. Untill then my shades that I can't see out of *sigh*. My mind is all over today I can't keep my mind on one subject, can yea tell??=).

Well off to bed fer me!
Josh

excerpt...hell..that was the whole thing. i'm sending you psychic birthday wand whacks, kiddo.
5:11 PM :: jes :: link :: 1 comment

I'd like to wish a happy 19^th birthday to Jösh, the coolest little brother the world has ever known.

Fight the good fight, bro. And don't get too drunk.
3:01 AM :: Jairus :: link :: 4 comments

9.14.2001

The world has started to calm down, it seems. People are starting to go about their everyday business, talking about something else on the streets, in the subway. A brave few have even dared to laugh, in public.

We signed a lease on an apartment, two days ago. It's huge, and right downtown. We can paint, remodel, do whatever we want to it. It even has a dishwasher.

All things are a process.
11:43 AM :: Jairus :: link :: 2 comments

9.12.2001

You can also donate money to relief funds via Amazon or PayPal, and if you're eligible (which Jes and I are not, due to having been pierced within the last year), please give blood.
8:18 AM :: Jairus :: link :: 4 comments

9.11.2001

it's the least you can do.
9:55 PM :: Jairus :: link :: 0 comments

Words fail me.
2:13 PM :: Jairus :: link :: 23 comments

9.9.2001

i should be a better productive person. i should be happy some of the time, and i should be kinder to people. i should have patience, and i should be out there with jai and venk seeing apartments today.

but i'm not. i'm here at the computer, waiting for night so i can go to sleep and today can be over.

it seems that is all i want these days. that, and jules' phone number, which i can't remember. these things make me sad.
4:11 PM :: jes :: link :: 5 comments

9.8.2001

wow.

for the first time in a long time...i am homesick. it's a strangle empty ache in my chest that gets worse when i go to school. i'm surrounded by kids who are still very much in contact with their family and friends, and most of them are in their hometown. i feel sortof...adrift in the sea of them. these shiny wholesome faces clutching their books to their chests as they crowd the halls chatting and laughing. i wander invisible through them and i feel like a spy, like i'm dreaming. nothing is familiar, but nothing is alien enough to seem new. i feel like i'm living a parody of my life, but instead of everything being comedic and over the top, it's hushed and demure. i don't hate any of these kids, and i don't really like any of them. i don't know the graffiti in the washroom off by heart, but it seems to follow the same rhythm of washroom scrawling.

it's not that they don't see me, i just...seem kind of gray. half there and half awake. i can't seem to remember any of their names, these children. i'm trying, but it's not working.

at the busstop yesterday morning, waiting on the crowded platform shoulder to shoulder in the sunlight, they were teeming around me with their backpacks brushing up against me. an old lady was standing near me, lost in the tides as well. here eyes were milk blue, i wasn't sure if she could even see. half her face was pulled up, the result of a stroke i supose, and her hair was swept back. it seemed to me that this style was not so much about appearance, as a result of doing it every morning for decades. she shuffled, shoved gently by the kids trying to find their friends. she swayed and so did i. a group of young girls separated us, they wore braces and backpacks, and they giggled together talking about boys and shoes. one of the girls stuck out their slim wrist, which was covered in bracelets she had been given at camp this summer. the colored threads in knots adorned all of their arms. they shared stories of the friends they had made this summer, and traded a few of the bracelets. one girl pulled some thread out of her pocket, bright yellows and purples, and she began to make another bracelet for one of the girls who didn't have as many.

the old woman, a lost expression on her face, and bits of breakfast on her old overcoat, had moved close to me. i watched her, as the chatter of teenagers clamored around us, she seemed oblivious. we were marooned together, it seemed, for none of the girls noticed us peering over their shoulders, watching them tie friendship bracelets to one another. we stayed like that, watching for a few minutes, ghosts both of us. just as one of the girls held out the bracelet to tie it around her friends wrist, i noticed something. the old lady had raised her hand, and was about to offer her wrist.

then she stopped, and turned away, disappearing into the sea of backpacks and laughter as the bus pulled up.

i wanted it. i wanted that bracelet, and those vapid giggling friends, i wanted bubblegum and phonecalls and notes in class written in coloured pens.

but it's not mine to have, and i don't really want it.

i feel so strange. it has been years since i have missed my mom.
3:19 PM :: jes :: link :: 6 comments

9.7.2001

The Ethenticator 2500 is the latest (and best-looking) in fingerprint-recognition security devices for your computer.

To be honest, I can't think of a damned reason why I'd ever need something like this, but I really want one.
12:13 PM :: Jairus :: link :: 1 comment

9.6.2001

What is your favourite sin?

(Thanks to Anna for the link.)
7:53 AM :: Jairus :: link :: 11 comments

9.5.2001

(On a lighter note...)

May I present: The most powerful man in the world.

He reminds me of that really embarrassing cousin you keep at the back of all the family picnics.

(Link via Oliver Willis.)
8:47 PM :: Jairus :: link :: 0 comments

Often at night, sometimes
out in the snow or going into the music, the hunch says,
"Deeper."
I don't know what it means.
Just, "Push it. Go further. Go deeper."
And when they come talking at me I get
antsy at times, but mostly I stay put and it keeps saying,
"Deeper. This is not it. You must go deeper."
There is danger in this, also
beautiful fingers and I believe it can issue in
gestures of concord; but I
cannot control it, all I know is one thing --
"Deeper. You must go further. You must go deeper."

     - Dennis Lee
2:06 PM :: Jairus :: link :: 6 comments

9.3.2001

I suppose I should mention that we've been given a reprieve; our landlord has allowed us to stay another month here in light of the fact that we got nowhere to go, and the person that was gonna move in backed out.

Thirty more days.
7:57 AM :: Jairus :: link :: 4 comments

9.2.2001

god.

reading jules' livejournal makes me so sad.

These people round here wear beaten down eyes
Sunk in smoke dried faces they're so resigned to what their fate is,
But not us, no not us we are far too young and clever.

come on eileen...fitting in a way.
4:16 PM :: jes :: link :: 2 comments