feel my pain

monday, september 17

And another. 15:25

A photo essay. 15:20

War is on all our lips, but I wonder if it is on all our minds and hearts? I've heard everything from calls for the US to bomb Afghanistan back in to the stone age (too late) to pleas for turning the other cheek and meeting violence with peace and love.

But what should be our response? As a Christian, what should I hope and attempt to influence how my government responds? First a homework assignment: read "The Paradox of War and Pacifism", "Onward Christian Soldiers? Christian Perspectives on War" and "The Justice in Just War" (book review). I don't necessarily agree with everything in the articles, but they're by far the best I've found on the Web.

A little later I'll make some comments.... 14:15

friday, september 14

Since I stayed at work until midnight last night, I lingered at home this morning to watch the service at the National Cathedral before going in to face the chaos at work.

The service walked a fine line between being truly Christian and alienating Jews and Muslims. I think it was courageous for the President to ask Billy Graham to give the sermon, one which I've already heard tightly-wound evangelicals criticize for being too ecumenical. I think Dr. Graham, though, was unequivocally Biblical, while avoiding rubbing others' face in the Gospel--he was as wise a serpent and gentle as a dove.

But even more powerful was President Bush's speech, in some ways a sermon itself, full of quotes from the Scriptures and Biblical language.

I wept through much of the service, and today I am even more proud to be an American. 18:43

thursday, september 13

Today, driving to work, American flags flew everywhere, and the ones on poles were at half-mast.

I have never been so proud to be an American. 14:27

wednesday, september 12

Of all the images, this one touched me most. 17:18

Overwhelmed.

Yesterday morning my brother called me at 8am.

"Turn on your TV. You're not going to believe this, but terrorists have flown airliners into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon," he said. My brother's a joker, so I didn't believe him. "Trust me, I'm not kidding, turn your TV on." I went to the living room and turned it on. There on the screen was the burning towers. I freaked. I don't remember what I said, but it included a few choice words. Anger and horror.

For the next hour I watched the updates, flipping channels. Replays: the second jet smashing into the other tower, the people hanging out the windows, the second tower collapsing, followed by the first, the debris and the dust cloud; the fire and damage at the Pentagon; eyewitnesses and talking heads. Being a witness to the deaths of thousands of people. Knowing that there will be more. I also knew it was going to be a long day at work.

Yesterday I spent most of the day neck deep in the news. I went home late last night. Emotionally and mentally exhausted.

Fortunately, when I got home there was a message from Karen. We talked. It helped. While others were at prayer vigils and get-togethers, I was at work. So I was glad I had Karen to vent to.

Last night I didn't sleep well, and I was woken by a wrong number at 7am. And, of course, I couldn't fall back asleep. So I turned on the TV. Again, I was overwhelmed by the realization of what happened.

The reaction around the world has been astounding. Karen wrote me, quoting of a Brit who said, "Today, everyone's an American." And Dani's written a touching entry of the reaction of her friends & family in Australia. How long have we waited for this? In my travels I've learned what a burden it is that we bear. Nations depend on us, yet we are often reviled. We are the big brother that the other siblings hate. Now they understand. I am proud to be an American, but I'm sad, too.

America needs to seek after justice, but not revenge. We must repay with an "eye for an eye" and a "tooth for a tooth," but nothing more. But we must also show mercy on the innocent while seeking justice on the guilty. It's going to be a long hard road.

There is an appointed time for everything.
    And there is a time for every event under heaven
A time to give birth and a time to die;
    A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.
A time to kill and a time to heal;
    A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to weep and a time to laugh;
    A time to mourn and a time to dance.
A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;
    A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing.
A time to search and a time to give up as lost;
    A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear apart and a time to sew together;
    A time to be silent and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate;
    A time for war and a time for peace.
(Ecclesiastes 3:1-9) 16:11

tuesday, september 11

Today's events were entirely tragic. Thousands of people died at the hands of evil men. I am sad, angry, and stunned.

All day long I've been mired in the news flowing out from so many sources. This is a serious event that is far more dire than I think many people realize. This means that many more people will die. This is an action that starts world wars.

Pray. Pray for God's mercy and for His care. 17:47

monday, september 10

Saturday night, I shuffled down to The Dane's to watch Memento. Good movie, but it lost something in the second viewing. Of course, the real story became much more clear, but because of that, it seemed a lot less clever. Contrary to popular opinion, I don't think I'd learn a whole lot more if I saw it third time.

Oh, and it was good to see Wayne-O, there.... 17:27

Too bad England doesn't have the death penalty. It's horrible crimes like those that demand it. Sad. 11:43

thursday, september 6

Bill Clinton: a bystander to genocide. A fascinating article on the Rwandan tragedy (with lots of links). [via Arts & Letters Daily. 18:42

Bad pick-up lines:

• Say, didn't we go to different schools together?
• I lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?
• Is that flavored lipstick? Can I taste it
• Are you a parking ticket, because you've got "fine" written all over you?
• Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see.
• Can I have a picture of you? I want to show Santa Claus exactly what I want for Christmas.
• I'd like some fries with that shake.
• Do you like raisins? How about a date?
• Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off.
• I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.
• Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
• Your daddy must be an alien, because there's nothing else in this world quite like you.
• Your daddy must be a thief, because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes.
• Do you have a sunburn or are you always this hot?
• Inheriting 80 million doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart....
• Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by once more?
• Can I borrow a quarter? My mom told me to call her when I met the girl of my dreams.
• If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put "U" and "I" together.
• Are your feet tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day.
• Well, when you want a MANfriend, come talk to me.
• You look like the type of girl that's heard every line in the book. So what's one more?

I really have no idea why.... 17:27

You are being watched. 15:30

The summer of 1992 I spent a month and a half in Croatia, working with various churches. Most of that time was spent in the buffer zone that the UN set up. I saw first-hand the effects of the war: buildings destroyed by bombers, grenade damage on sidewalks and walls from the street fighting, crumbling homes deserted by Serbs and destroyed by vengeful Croats, a child missing the leg blown off by a landmine.

My friend Irena, who came to study in the States, was a refugee; the Serbs invaded her town on a Sunday, shelling it; and Irena, who had stayed home sick, ran through the streets to the church to find her family as the her town exploded around her. They weren't able to return to their home until five years later.

Kornel was an infantryman; his squad set off a booby-trapped mine while on patrol in the woods. Kornel took shrapnel in the legs and butt. At the same time, his brother Božo was terribly burned in a tractor fire on the family farm. Kornel came home in time to donate the skin he needed grafted to his legs and arms.

As much as I saw that the Croats were the victims of Serbian aggression, I also saw that they could also be victimizers as well. It doesn't surprise me, though, when I read that Croats have a hard time swallowing that their people could be guilty of war crimes; they had the same reaction in '92. I do think the things some Croats did were far less numerous and extreme as the Serbs, but nonetheless they are guilty. But defending your homeland does not include committing the same kinds of criminal acts as the Serbs. 15:27