Recognise the cliffs
Waves don't crash as in my dream
I know what it meant.
posted by skot herbert at 12:11

Essay - HOW WE EAT OUR YOUNG
By Mike Patton

If music is dying, musicians are killing it. Composers are the ones
decomposing it. We are as responsible as anyone--although we'd love not to
admit it. We lash out at "The Industry", blaming things like corporate
structure for our shitty music--but we are the ones making it. We open the
box they've given us and jump in, wrap ourselves up, and even lick the
stamp. Why? Insecurity--the need for acceptance--maybe even money. We're not
thinking about our music, just how it looks. One would rather have the warm
tongue of a critic licking his asshole than the tongue of his spouse. It
gives him a sense of validity and power. He seems to defy gravity. Maybe it
is because he doesn't know what the hell else to do. He sees it coming--but
freezes with panic like a deer in the headlights. Don't laugh--I've done it
and you probably have too. And it has undoubtedly effected out music. (But
have we learned anything form it?) We know that we are mostly a lot of
slobbering babies who need constant stroking. We realize also in the moral
order of society, we occupy positions similar to the thief, pimp, or peeping
tom. We know that even if one has the pride of a bull, it is hard enough
just to remain focused in this world. It gives us milliona upon millions of
images--distractions--all saying the same thing at the same time: DO NOT
THINK. If your fantasy and desire give you migraines, how easy it is to
forget them when there is so much to look at. Our creations die quickly when
abandoned like this. Do we realize that we are eating our young? It seems
the passion that moves us is accompanied by an incredible urge to squash it.
It is as quick as a fucking reflex--a conditioned response. It it a sexual
problem? A puritanical one? The most intense and convincing music achieves a
sexual level of expression, but what we normally feel is frigidity and
limpness. It is just too easy for an artist to 'socialize' his desires when
life tells him cardboard is OK. You should be ashamed of yourself! What is
your fucking problem? If you don't come out, sooner or later you will die in
there. Use chunks of yourself. Bodily fluids. Look left and right. Sift
through others' belongings. Borrow. Steal. And try to achieve some sort of
pleasure while doing it. This excitement should increase and intensify when
you visualize it being shared by a number of people. Think about it. If it
comes from inside you, it is automatically valid--it just may or may not be
good. Because if it is not communicating in some way, its pleasure is as
short-lived as a quick fuck in the back room. It doesn't mean shit. The
labor of many composers is to construct elaborate walls of sound--but we
often forget to leave a window or door to crawl out of. ow can we survive in
these clever little rooms? We must eat our creation or we will starve. At
this point, we have heard what we wanted to hear--our ears have shut down.
We've resigned as slaves to our own gluttony. But if we have boarded up our
learning environment, our only way out is to teach what we know. Will they
listen? Why should they? Because they need you as much as you need them. You
can save them from being swallowed up by the world--they can save you from
being swallowed up by the world. Young and old players should be seeking
each other out and using each other. They should develope a healthy exchange
of smut--and learn to wear each other's masks. In this kind of environment,
incredible things can happen. Music can emerge that is athletic and
personal. Music that is riddled with contradictions--impossibilities. And
that is the shit that can defy gravity.
posted by skot herbert at 10:10

finished survivor yesterday. can't wait to see a film version. check out tylerdurden.net for real life fight clubs. "I was told that 85% of all fiction sells to older middle-age woman. 85%, my God! I just felt like I was really cutting my throat to write a book that wasn't about an older middle-age woman to fall in love. Somehow I knew there wouldn't be a market for it, but what else am I going to write. I think it's more important to write something that brings men back to reading than it is to write for people who already read. There's a reason men don't read, and it's because books don't serve men. It's time we produce books that serve men." - CHUCK PALAHNIUK

looking for a new place to live on the net today. would it kill them to include photos?

my housemate paul's dad is in hospital with a dicky ticker. my best wishes go out to brian.
posted by skot herbert at 16:45

finished fight club last night. i shouldn't have been afraid of disappointment, as the book differs from the movie quite markedly. started "survivor" this morning. lots of common threads, even down to common sentences. both by chuck palahnuik.
posted by skot herbert at 13:01

damn it's hot today!
posted by skot herbert at 12:52

this weekend, i'll start looking for a new place to live. moving out of a three bedroom house, with enough furniture to fill a four b/r house, and two cats. it's going to be a nightmare, because i'm hoping to find me a bachelor flat of some sort. my flatmate is moving in with his woman. i can't go through trying to find another flatmate willing to pay a big chunk of weekly rent again, and i need a change of scene, so it's off house hunting for me.
posted by skot herbert at 10:20

last night esn got back into rehearsing, now that ben's back from thailand. felt really refreshed, especially after some pizza and beer (thanks styx!). we were sloppy as hell, but full of energy and the mood was great.

borrowed the fight club novella (?) from graeme last night, thought it was time i read it having watched the movie close to a dozen times. i wish that i could read it without already knowing the plot twist.
posted by skot herbert at 12:16

!
posted by skot herbert at 17:05

this is the final and total rundown of what we saw at the stadium the other night -
18:00 - 23:20
Athletics
Women's 100m Hurdles Round 2
Women's Pole Vault Final
Men's 110m Hurdles Semifinals
Women's 400m Hurdles Semifinals
Men's Discus Throw Final
Men's 400m Hurdles Semifinals
Men's Triple Jump Final
Women's 400m Final
Men's 400m Final
Men's 110m Hurdles Final
Women's 5000m Final
Men's 800m Semifinals
Women's 800m Final
Men's 10000m Final
posted by skot herbert at 10:40

less than a week to go until i'm re-united with my girl. she left july 10, leaving me to occupy myself with things like the internet, and knitting.
posted by skot herbert at 10:37

last night i dreamt that i was in an apartment building, with some close friends, which was built on a cliff overlooking the ocean. we were on one of the upper levels, about the 20th floor, looking out at the ocean, which strangely enough had about a 50 meter swell. just as i was thinking that the sea doesn't usually move in such great big globs, a huge wave broke on the cliffs below, and water rose right up to the level we were on, and started seeping in through the window. as the aftermath of the wave began to recede, the whole building shiftted. it was obvious the building was no longer attached to solid ground. As the building began to topple over and (thankfully) float, we began thinking about evecuation. but no-one seemed panicked. i suppose you've got to expect that kind of thing with 25 storey buildings on cliffs. and when you eat pizza before going to bed.
posted by skot herbert at 10:27

went to the olympic athletics with my brother last night. This plagiarism is from channel 7's website, but it's a pretty good rundown of last night, except for not going into detail about the 10,000 mens and 5,000 womens, both of which were great, very close races (but lacking in australians, therefore, somewhat irrelevant!?). But first my own observations -
- aussie aussie oi oi - tremendous the first seventy times.
- the volunteers were seriously hopped up on prozac and other happy pills : so friendly and helpful! the image of australia we're projecting - hows about projecting it back onto ourselves in the future?
- 112,000 people clapping in unison is an incredible sound (when gregoriova was making her final attempts)
- no-one knows the lyrics to the cuban national anthem
- the smooth way in which it was run was amazing. even though it was a little pricey, you could wee and get food or drink and be back in your seat in 5 minutes.

anyway, here's what i culled from the site - - - - -

......strange for an Olympic athletics meet, they have plenty to cheer about. Tatiana Grigorieva is currently second in the women's pole vault, Andrew Murphy is a genuine medal hope in the men's triple jump, and the race that will stop the nation better than any Melbourne Cup ever could is just minutes away.

8.02pm: The field for the 400m final have emerged onto the track. You can tell that Cathy has appeared, first by the murmurs, the ripples of applause then the flashlights. The sense of anticipation is extraordinary.

8.07pm: The first sight of Cathy on the big screen brings a roar of applause. Soon after, the 400m field is introduced to the crowd. Tatiana is running second in the pole vault.

8.10pm: They're off; the buzz of flashbulbs is astonishing. By the time the runners reach us, Cathy is third but edging closer.

"She's gonna kill 'em!" someone yells above the din, and on cue Cathy races to the lead.

All of us, old and young, are on our feet. As Cathy crosses the line the noise is everything I heard at the swimming, only more so. Every single person in the stadium wanted her to win and she has. Christmas has come early.

8.18pm: Tatiana leads in the pole vault and Michael Johnson is about to go in the men's 400m. Murphy has jumped twice, how he's going nobody knows. They've just completed the men's discus final but we've paid so little attention they may as well have conducted it in the carpark. There are just too many things happening, too many places to look.

8.22pm: Johnson, like Phar Lap, wins by a minute. My friend next to me taps me on the shoulder and says, "That was one of the greatest performances we'll ever see, and it was an anti-climax."

8.33pm: Tatiana takes the lead again in the pole vault. It would be too much to expect two Australian Olympic athletics golds in one night, wouldn't it? Never have I been at a sporting event where everyone in the crowd appears to want the same thing.

9.18pm: No sooner have Tatiana's celebrations for her silver medal concluded and we are treated to one of the most wonderful, most Australian moments I will ever see. Cathy's medal celebration. Not even the choice of Kevan Gosper to present the medals could ruin it. It was all the crowd around me could do not to boo as one.
posted by skot herbert at 16:33